Consultation: It’s all in the convincing delivery

By BRUCE CAMERON Barrie Examiner October 27 2010
So what’s a political consultant anyway? Far as I can figure, it’s someone who gets paid very well for (metaphorically) pointing out every flake of dandruff on a politician’s shoulders. The best part is, like a marketing consultant, 90% of the job is saying you’re a consultant. There’s no official accreditation or experience required. After you get a client, you just start gabbing as if you’re sure of each and every drop of wisdom you dispense and let the money roll in. What’s not to like?
Here are a few examples of what a political consultant could churn some good dough on, based on watching the A-News coverage of the municipal election on Monday night.
Our shiny brand new mayor-elect, Jeff Lehman, ran a campaign that was head and shoulders above anyone else. And yet, there’s room for someone like me to make some coin.
Jeff, I’ll put it to you straight. You have to watch your too-frequent use of the word “look.”
Being greeted at the door of your campaign headquarters by A-News’s Rob Cooper, you answered four of his first five questions with “look” as the first word. Yes, this automatic verbal crutch does sound authoritative, but reminds too much of the unctuous- sounding Brian Mulroney when he was prime minister.
Once or twice an interview is fine. Four or five times within 60 seconds grates on the ear. You’re welcome. This is what I’m here for. And in the spirit of a boisterous local election enlivened on a fine voter turnout, well, for you, no charge.
Speaking of verbal crutches, MP Patrick Brown, who with former Collingwood mayor Terry Geddes, made up A-News’s team of “political pundits” on Monday night, has a severe fondness for “speaks to,” as in something like, “Well, that really speaks to his credibility as a candidate.” Again, once in a while is OK. To hear it at least 10 times within 20 minutes is annoying. No worries, Mr. Brown. You needn’t pay me for this astute observation. It’s what I do. (At least for this week’s column.)
Speaking of that panel, what was Geddes doing there? He is obviously relaxed in front of the camera and can chirp away about his hometown and/or Simcoe County politics, but every time hosts Jayne Pritchard and Tony Grace hoisted the topic of Barrie politics (which was often), Geddes sat there like a bump on a log and let Brown do the talking. In this particular choice of a commentator, ‘A’ gets a C. What they should have done was hire the guy who covers Barrie politics for a living, The Barrie Examiner’s Bob Bruton.
When live coverage veered over to the Dave Aspden headquarters — ah, forget it. It was sad watching reporter Chris Lesage ask Aspden to dissect his dismal mayoral election numbers, which, at the time, were hovering at around 4% of voter support. Lesage may as well have been trying not to antagonize a wounded animal. Besides, at this point, what advice could I offer the soon-to-be former mayor?
I’ll end this political consultancy gig with a word for Mike Ramsay, who, in his perfect world, would be thinking of himself as soon-to-be mayor. Mike, I figure you’ll be back running for that job someday. Next time around, don’t be so serious so much of the time. Try to enjoy the process a little more. You’re welcome. Anytime. Besides, this was fun. (It also has me wondering how much all of this advice is actually worth on the open market.)
Bruce Cameron, a news broadcaster for ROCK95/KOOL FM, is a freelance writer. He invites you to check out his blog, The Flotsam File.